Well, a merry Winter’s Veil to all of you. If I don’t seem quite up to the requisite level of holiday cheer, it’s probably because I’ve been had. My advice to you is to research thoroughly all discount travel packages you are offered before jumping on board, no matter how stringent the deadline the agent impresses upon you.

I do NOT recommend the Wailing Caverns Spa and Health Resort for your winter getaway. I expect the spasmodiary, as I have taken to calling the catalogues of goblin imaging, that follows will more than adequately explain the abysmal rating I have given it, and which it richly deserves.

And I wish to restate, for the record, that I am not in the habit of punching elves, but it had to be done.

Alas my troubles were only beginning, as you shall see in the next issue, dear Hordesister or -brother.

-Tenny.

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